Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Life...

i used to think that humans will live to 100 yrs old. And that when i was 10, i thought that i had juz "used up" 1/10 of my life. Now that i am older and much wiser, i beg to differ on this.

Life is really very unpredictable. U can be alive one moment, and dead the next moment. Like what someone told me "Everyone thinks that they wont kenna fatal accident, so who's the one that kenna?".

I often spend sleepless nights thinking abt death. Not juz of my own, but also of the people around me. There will come a time whereby everyone dies, the only thing uncertain is whether this happens before or after i do.

At the same time, i wonder, how can it be so that i can die really happy? This is quite interesting... If i were to do nothing which is immoral, or foolish, i wont die a sad person. But that does not mean that i will die a happy person!! To die a happy man is alot alot harder. In fact, i have yet to figure out how to do so... The only thing i have figured out is that if i were to die now, i wont die happy.

And so... i start to ponder on how to be happy. I also used to think that a simple life would work out juz fine. Yet at the same time, i dun think i can live without my aircon and bed. So ya... so much so for a simple life... Maybe a moderate life would do juz fine?! Okie... that involves getting a moderate job, and moderate jobs are pretty stressful too... And then the question comes... How would getting a job even tie in with being happy?

In life, we really cant have everything. During Finishing Touch class, we had to make a choice: would job satisfaction to u mean a high paying job, or a job where u dun get high pay but more time on ur own? For me, that's a really hard choice... I have yet to figure that out too btw...

I dream of running away, far far away, stressfree... hmmm... but then... if i have achieved nothing in the working world, will i be happy? I have never really liked the idea of working my ass off btw...

And so... the debate goes on... on how i can be happy... Hiaz... when i will figure this out?
kEn ken 0 comments